Asking the right questions

Ariel Levy, "The Lesbian Bride's Handbook"


What is the right thing to wear to a wedding?
What is a wedding?
What is a public declaration of love?
What is love?

What is the right thing?
What is it to be married?
What is acceptable?

What is the wrong thing to wear to a wedding?


Is she a guest?  Is she the bride?
Should she wear white?
Why shouldn't she wear black?
Why does she obsess about what she should or shouldn't wear?
How can she not outdo the bride?
If she is the bride, how can she outdo everyone else?
Does she have to wear a dress?  Would a suit be appropriate?  Would jeans?
Is the wedding formal?


P2) What is a real wedding?
 What is real?
Why wouldnt she wear white?
Why is white a precedent?
Whats the difference between a gay wedding and a straight wedding?
Why does she prefer color over white?
P3) Why dont bohemians accecpt weddings?
What is a bohemian?
Why dosent she want a real wedding?
What is festive?
How much should you spend on a wedding?
Why wouldnt you spend lavishly on a wedding?
What is lavish?
Why is she not okay about the word marriage?
What is feeling okay?
P4) Why didnt she find marriage attractive?
What is attractive?
What is a "Party about love"?
What is a party?
Why spend the time?
Why spend the time on marriage arrangements?
What does marraige arraingements consist of?
P7) What should a wedding consist of?
Who set the standards for a traditional wedding?
What is traditional?
Are all weddings parties about love?
What is a party?
What is love?
What makes a good part vs. a bad party?
P8) Are good parties glamorous?
Do material items define glamour?
Do material items make or break atmosphere?
What is important about atmosphere?
It if's "hers-and-hers" is it an imitation of the "real thing"?
What is the real thing?
What is classy?
P9) What has she done?
Should she have listened to her mother?
She any of us listen to our mothers?
Is a wedding like a bat mitzvah?
Was her decision misguided?
Did she look before she lept?
Did she need to look?
P10) Is it ever too late?
Should she be doubting herself?
Where is the point of no return?
Is it all just a waste of time?
Does she need a wedding to prove her love?
Why do much doubt?
Did she go in over her head?
Why do they need to dfeclare their intentions?

#18 paragraphs 4-7
Does she really want to get married?
Does she feel okay?
Is the organizing bothering her?
Is the idea of her being marrried getting to her?
What is a "party of love"?
Why is there negative connotation - "fat gay wedding"?
Why is she mentioning the word "gay" in a bad way?
What's the big deal with the dress ? why yellow?
Why would she put herself through this?
Is it the money while plainning causing her frustration?
"idea...seems unnatural" - Is it love at first sight? What is love?
What's with the bright colors (dress, flowers)?
What's with the luxuries of the party?
Is this what she imagined her wedding to be?
Is this a wedding or a party?
If this isn't what she wants, why is she doing it?
How come she doesn't want to view it as a wedding (for what it is)?





Is Mrs. Norquist her future partners mother?
What is flawless?
Why does she care what everyone thinks?
Why is her mother's nicname Rocky?
What does her mother do for a living that she can wear pajamas to work?
Why are they all having such a herd time calling this a wedding?
What about the wedding made it rock?
How much $ is she selling the dress for on ebay?
Where was the wedding?
Why doesn't she have a lifestyle that would allow her to wear the dress again?


P 9- Is she picking a red dress?
Did she wear a red dress at her bat mitzvah?
Is it something she regreted?
Is she scared she is going to regret the wedding, too?

P 10- Why is she regretting the wedding so much?
Why would she want to cancell the wedding?
Why is it too late?
When is the wedding, who close is it?

P 11- Why is she so scared of formal wear?
Why is it not a real wedding?
What the difference between a wedding and a "party about love"?

P 12- Wh y is Amy always wearing a suit?
why exactly does Amy crave public acceptence
What exactly is so uncool?
Why isn't she excited? Why is Amy so excited?

P 13- Why is this green dress so special?
Why does she like it more that the others?
What was so skeptical about her sneakers?
Paragraph 14


- Why doesn’t she want to wear white?

- What’s so special about the one she saw?

- Why does she describe the salesgirl as a water lily of a woman

- Why does she say “my wedding” now instead of love party?

Paragraph 15

- Why are the dresses sp expensive?

- How are they able to make her look thinner or more expensive?

- Why did she pick the particular dress that she chose?

- Why was she thinking of Amy’s mother instead?

Paragraph 16

- Why did Mrs. Norquist not talk to Amy for a year after she finished college?

- Why does the narrator like Mrs. Norquist so much?

- Why does Mrs. Norquist gossip so much?

Paragraph 17

- Why are they staying in neutral territory?

- Why do they like talking about clothes so much?

- When are they not telling each other the whole truth?

- Why doesn’t Amy look at fashion magazines?

Paragraph 18

- Why would Mrs. Norquist see their lives as shameful?

- Why would the dress she bought make the fact they they’re homosexual less humiliating?

- Why is their homosexuality linked with horror?

Paragraph 19

- What made the narrator’s mom not care about anything?

- And why does the narrator care about this?




Paragraphs 14-19
14.)
-Why doesn't she want to wear white?
-What's so special about the dress she saw?
-Why does she call the salesgirl a water lily of a woman?
-Why does she say wedding now instead of love party?
15.)
-Why are the dresses shes looking at so expensive and how do they make her look thinner?
-Why did she pick this particular dress?